BLAME THE WOMEN. SPARE THE MEN.
Based on the article citing Jack Neo's infidelity as the issue, it is stated that the wife, Madam Irene Kng's endless boundary of tolerance has something to do with the Asian Family Values, or rather chinese culture. According to the late Robert van Gulik, a noted sinologist, sex, as seen by the Chinese, was not seen as a wrongful act as long as the consort and venue were appropriate. As such, 'san qi si qie' or 'three wives and four concubines' was common, especially for the wealthy. Furthermore, the victim of the adultery (wife) would have to blame it on her fate or the other woman, and not her adulterous spouse.
Next, in the confucianist society, males are seen as the dominating and important figure in the family while females are being dominated and marginalised! Gender inequality. Based on a survey in Taipei, Guangzhou, Shanghai and Beijing, most felt that the wronged party -usually the wife- ought to remain patient and try means to persuade her spouse to return.
Lastly, while mainland chinese men preferred women worse off than them, the women there preferred smarter and financially stable men. Besides these mainland women, there are also modern women who are willing to get involved with married men for romantic intimacy, without eventual marriage in mind.
I personally disagree with this confucianist theory that women are to be blamed for everything. The victim of this situation, adultery, should at least have a say. There should be a welfare organisation or helpline (for advice) for women who are going through this period of difficult time- tolerate unfaithful men so as to maintain a complete family. i think that men, no matter how rich, should stay loyal to their spouse, who sacrifices so much for the family. Furthermore, i think that the Chinese thinking of 'sex' is definitely unacceptable. One should be responsible for one's act and commiting adultery, by right, should instill guilt in parties involve and not allow them to escape this punishment- to have to live with guilt- with the mentality that 'as long as the consort and venue were appropriate, sex is not wrong'.
All in all, i protest and argue that women should be appreciated and not taken for granted! Marriage is a commitment. Commit or forget it.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
I just want to point out that marriage is of great importance to society in Arab countries. I have read books that girls as young as 12 years old have been sold off by their family to marry an OLD MAN! This practice is rampant in Arab countries, for an instance in Yemen. I totally do not accept this where girls are sold off to help her family. In addition, these young wives are of no importance to the husbands but instead regarded as sex slaves. Wives MUST obey and allow their husbands to touch them at any times. If she pushes him away, this can be considered as a sin. Worst still, the wives may be punished harshly by being locked in a room throughout her life. THIS IS TRUE! I just people to be aware that such acts that depicts women low status in he society is STILL ONGOING.
ReplyDeleteNonetheless, there has been human rights group who have tried negotiating with the Yemeni court of law to raise the least marriage age of girls to 17.
Hui Jun, your response is very spicy! I like =)
ReplyDeleteSyahirah, you are right to point out that such cruel treatment of women persist across cultures.
Child bride bleeds to death
What has led men to expect such behaviour from women? Is sex only to be enjoyed by men?